I got a call from the realtor two days ago, and we close on my house June 2nd. My heart sank. I guess deep down, I was hoping their financing would fall through. I love my house with all the beautiful shade trees and the enclosed front porch. I have a glider on the porch. I had invisioned myself using on a regular basis after my retirement. Of course, good neighbors all around me which I will miss.

Although I haven’t actually lived there for 3 years, it has still been home to me. We have been living with my mom since dad passed because she was afraid to be alone. I thought it was better to leave her in her environment and move in. She was having a hard enough time adjusting so I didn’t want to have her leave her home.

Yesterday we went down to the house to finish getting the rest of our stuff out. I had to look like a nut….crying as I was cutting the grass for the last time. I even pulled all the weeds out of the flower garden. I had my husband clean out the eaves on the house and the garage. I’m going to buy the new owners flowers. They will be surprised when they walk in and see a bouquet sitting there.

Let’s see…what am I losing???….a place I felt comfortable, the ability to build on relationships I had established the years I had lived there.

What am I gaining???…Financial I guess. I won’t have to worry about someone falling and getting hurt on the property. I won’t have taxes, utility bills, or insurance bills.

I know God has another plan for me. I’m just dragging my heels all the way. When I was younger, I loved moving. It was always a new adventure. I’m having a hard time seeing it like that this time. Perhaps I’m getting to be an ole fuddy-duddy.

I see my next hurdle is going to be getting through the closing without crying. I’ve got to tell myself to be strong. (dang, I’m such a baby) (Sigh)